Celina's avatar
Celina

Dec. 28, 2025

0
Introspection writing

1- I saw oil water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow make the water a completely different form of state. The shapes that barely touches each other. I wonder at what cost were they separated in a past life.

2- The wind carries all the bad thoughts away, it´s getting cold. There, a feather bird fights to take the wind down. Somehow it trusts his brave, to not fall, to not lose. My eyes met its. and Immediately understood it .

english-correction
Corrections

1- I saw oily water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow makde the water into a completely different form of state.

The shapes that barely touches each other.

Since it's shapes plural, it should be "touch" instead of "touches"

There, a feathered bird fights to take the wind down.

Somehow it trusts hisits own bravery, to not fall, to not lose.

My eyes met its eyes.

You can use "his", "her" on their own and leave the eyes implied, but it sounds really unnatural to do the same for "its" I think.

and II immediately understood it .

It's considered poor style to start a sentence with "and" in English. If you hadn't ended the last sentence with a full stop and just used this as an extra clause, you could have used "and" here.

Feedback

Watch out for nouns where there are different adjectives used instead (oil/oily, feather/feathered, bravery/brave)

Introspectionve writing

1- I saw oil and water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow make the water a completely different form of stateconsistency.

The shapes that barely touches each other.

I wonder at what cost were they separated in a past life.

2- The wind carries all the bad thoughts away, it´s getting cold.

There, a feather bird fights to take the wind down.

Somehow it trusts his brave,mself to not fall, to not lose.

My eyes met hits.

and I immediately understood it .

Introspection wve Writing

1- I saw oily water running under my feet, a. All that greasy and colorful liquid somehow maketurned the water into a completely different form of state.

Separating into two sentences felt more natural in this case. Instead of "form", you can also use "form of matter" or "state of matter" since you are writing metaphorically.

The sShapes that barely touches each other.

I wonder at what cost were they separated in a past life.?

2- The wind carries all the bad thoughts away, i. It´s getting cold.

Separating into two sentences felt more natural in this case.

There, a feathered bird fights to take the wind down.

Somehow it trusts hits bravery, to not fall, to not lose.

Your next sentence uses "its", so I'm changing for consistency.

My eyes met its.

aAnd I immediately understood it .

Feedback

Very vivid imagery!

Introspection writing


Introspection wve Writing

Introspectionve writing

1- I saw oil water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow make the water a completely different form of state.


1- I saw oily water running under my feet, a. All that greasy and colorful liquid somehow maketurned the water into a completely different form of state.

Separating into two sentences felt more natural in this case. Instead of "form", you can also use "form of matter" or "state of matter" since you are writing metaphorically.

1- I saw oil and water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow make the water a completely different form of stateconsistency.

1- I saw oily water running under my feet, all that greasy and colorful liquid somehow makde the water into a completely different form of state.

The shapes that barely touches each other.


The sShapes that barely touches each other.

The shapes that barely touches each other.

The shapes that barely touches each other.

Since it's shapes plural, it should be "touch" instead of "touches"

I wonder at what cost were they separated in a past life.


I wonder at what cost were they separated in a past life.?

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

2- The wind carries all the bad thoughts away, it´s getting cold.


2- The wind carries all the bad thoughts away, i. It´s getting cold.

Separating into two sentences felt more natural in this case.

This sentence has been marked as perfect!

There, a feather bird fights to take the wind down.


There, a feathered bird fights to take the wind down.

There, a feather bird fights to take the wind down.

There, a feathered bird fights to take the wind down.

Somehow it trusts his brave, to not fall, to not lose.


Somehow it trusts hits bravery, to not fall, to not lose.

Your next sentence uses "its", so I'm changing for consistency.

Somehow it trusts his brave,mself to not fall, to not lose.

Somehow it trusts hisits own bravery, to not fall, to not lose.

My eyes met its.


This sentence has been marked as perfect!

My eyes met hits.

My eyes met its eyes.

You can use "his", "her" on their own and leave the eyes implied, but it sounds really unnatural to do the same for "its" I think.

and Immediately understood it .


aAnd I immediately understood it .

and I immediately understood it .

and II immediately understood it .

It's considered poor style to start a sentence with "and" in English. If you hadn't ended the last sentence with a full stop and just used this as an extra clause, you could have used "and" here.

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