Correspondence: A Japanese Epistolary Novella 5-1

akimi

Oct. 29, 2025

Correspondence: A Japanese Epistolary Novella 5-1

Fifth Exchange

Dear Takeshi,

I was shocked to read about your accident in your letter. How is your injury now?

I called my mother back home to ask about your condition. She told me you’re already walking almost normally, which was a great relief.

Still, imagining the scene from your letter made me shiver. Please, do take care of yourself.

It’s been nearly a year since I started living in this town.

Time flies, doesn’t it? No, actually, in the beginning, each day felt slow—at least until I returned home for Obon.

While I was at my parents’ house, I found myself picturing this town. I imagined the people at work, the kind couple who let me stay at their house, and the friendly shopkeepers who always greet me when I go shopping. I knew they would welcome me warmly when I came back.

That was when I realized this town had become my second hometown.

To be honest, in the beginning, I often wanted to go back. I felt so lonely that I secretly cried in my room, wanting to give up everything and return to you.

And yet, in my letters, I pretended to be strong.

Now, I no longer feel that way. I love this town, and I’m surrounded by kind people. Every day is enjoyable.

Last month, there was a sudden power outage.

Fortunately, the kerosene heater was on, so I didn’t freeze, but I had no candles in my room.

To make matters worse, the main house was empty at the time, so I couldn’t borrow any.

In the pitch dark, I couldn’t move for fear of tripping or knocking over the heater. I just stayed still.

At first, I felt terribly anxious and lonely, but as I wrapped myself in a blanket, memories began to flood back.

Moments with you from childhood, and scenes from our hometown—they came to me one after another.

Eventually, I must have fallen asleep.

Suddenly, the lights came back on, and I woke up startled.

The outage lasted about two hours. It was probably caused by snow weighing down the power lines. That happens often back home, doesn’t it?
Just then, the couple from the main house returned and came to check on me.

They said I must have felt lonely and apologized for being away. They invited me for tea and dorayaki.

They’re truly kind and thoughtful people.

Please take good care of your injured leg.

Spring is just around the corner—my favorite season.

When the cherry blossoms bloom, I can’t help but feel excited.

Even though we’re apart, I imagine you gazing at the blossoms too, and it makes me feel like we’re close at heart.

Yours sincerely,

From Kyoko
March 6, 1976 (Showa 51)

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Corrections

Misong

Correspondence: A Japanese Epistolary Novella 5-1

Fifth Exchange

Dear Takeshi,

I was shocked to read about your accident in your letter.

This sentence works very well, but "I was shocked to read about your accident in your previous letter" or "in the previous letter you sent" sounds a bit more natural since it specifies which letter she's referring to a bit more.

How is your injury now?

I called my mother back home to ask about your condition.

She told me you’re already walking almost normally, which was a great relief.

The sentence makes sense, but "already walking almost normally" feels a bit too clustered and a bit clunky to read given that "already" is placed before as a descriptor for "walking almost normally", the latter which is 3 words, including 2 more descriptors.

If you want to keep the descriptor, putting "already" (or "now) near the end might be better.
"She told me you're almost walking normally now, which was a great relief."
"She told me you're almost walking normally already, which was a great relief."

Or spacing out the words more.
"She told me that your walking is already close to normal, which was a great relief."

Still, imagining the scene from your letter made me shiver.

Please, do take care of yourself.

It’s been nearly a year since I started living in this town.

Time flies, doesn’t it?

No, actually, in the beginning, each day felt slow—at least until I returned home for Obon.

While I was at my parents’ house, I found myself picturing this town.

This works, but adding a frequency word might make it better, e.g., "I often found myself picturing this town."

I would imagined the people at work, the kind couple who let me stay at their house, and the friendly shopkeepers who always greet me when I go shopping.

If the action of "picturing this town" mentioned in the previous sentence was done more than once, "I would imagine" emphasizes that more than once aspect of it better than "I imagined". If it was only done once (so no frequency verb needed then either), "I imagined" would work perfectly fine!

I knew they would welcome me warmly when I came back.

That was when I realized this town had become my second hometown.

To be honest, in the beginning, I often wanted to go back.

I felt so lonely that I secretly cried in my room, wanting to give up everything and return to you.

And yet, in my letters, I pretended to be strong.

Now, I no longer feel that way.

I love this town, and I’m surrounded by kind people.

Every day is enjoyable.

Last month, there was a sudden power outage.

Fortunately, the kerosene heater was on, so I didn’t freeze, but I had no candles in my room.

To make matters worse, the main house was empty at the time, so I couldn’t borrow any.

I just stayed still.

At first, I felt terribly anxious and lonely, but as I wrapped myself in a blanket, memories began to flood back.

Moments with you from our childhood, and scenes from our hometown—they came to me one after another.

Eventually, I must have fallen asleep.

Suddenly, the lights came back on, and I woke up startled.

The outage had lasted for about two hours.

This is to emphasize that the outage happened before the lights came back on. "The outage lasted for about two hours" is in simple past tense, whereas "The outage had lasted for about two hours" is in past perfect tense and makes it clear, through grammar, that the outage happened before the lights came back on (even though it is already logically implied). I do not know the tenses well, so I may be mistaken.

It was probably caused by snow weighing down the power lines.

That happens often back home, doesn’t it?

Just then, the couple from the main house returned and came to check on me.

It works, but "and came over to check on me" sounds a bit more natural!

They said I must have felt lonely and apologized for being away.

They invited me for tea and dorayaki.

They’re truly kind and thoughtful people.

Please take good care of your injured leg.

Spring is just around the corner—my favorite season.

When the cherry blossoms bloom, I can’t help but feel excited.

Even though we’re apart, I imagine you gazing at the blossoms too, and it makes me feel like we’re close at heart.

In my own experience, the phrase "close at heart" isn't used very often. But the sentence makes sense to me if you're using it like in the phrase "miles apart but close at heart" where "close at heart" is referring to having a deep emotional connection (despite the great physical distance). A similar phrase is "close in spirit", though the meaning is slightly different. For a more natural way of saying it, I think that the correction by emily9 below is really good!

Yours sincerely,

From Kyoko

March 6, 1976 (Showa 51)

Misong

Oct. 29, 2025

Edits/additional notes: (I wish I could edit my original edits since that would be more clear.)
Correction: I would imagine the people at work, the kind couple who let me stay at their house, and the friendly shopkeepers who always greet me when I go shopping. (I accidentally changed go to went).
- IF the "picturing this town" mentioned in the previous sentence was done more than once, "I would imagine" emphasizes that more than once aspect of it better than "I imagined". If it was only done once (so no frequency verb needed then either), "I imagined" would work perfectly fine!

Note: The outage had lasted for about two hours.
- This is to emphasize that the outage happened before the lights came back on. "The outage lasted for about two hours" is in simple past tense, whereas "The outage had lasted for about two hours" is in past perfect tense and makes it clear, through grammar, that the outage happened before the lights came back on (even though it is already logically implied). I do not know the tenses well, so I may be mistaken.

Note: "makes me feel like we're close at heart"
- In my own experience, the phrase "close at heart" isn't used very often. But the sentence makes sense to me if you're using it like in the phrase "miles apart but close at heart" where "close at heart" is referring to having a deep emotional connection (despite the great physical distance). A similar phrase is "close in spirit", though the meaning is slightly different. For a more natural way of saying it, I think that the correction by emily9 below is really good!

Misong

Oct. 29, 2025

Oh wait I just realized that I can edit my corrections. I will add these up there then!

akimi

Oct. 31, 2025

Thank you for your advice. Thanks to you, I realized many things. I revised it like this based on your suggestions.

"I was shocked to read about your accident in the previous letter you sent. "

"She told me that your walking is already close to normal, which was a great relief."

"The outage had lasted for about two hours. "

"I often found myself picturing this town."

“and came over to check on me”

I thought over the section you last mentioned, and decide to change it like this.

"Even though we’re apart, I often picture you gazing at the blossoms too, and it brings you near to me."

Thank you so much for spending so much time for me. Your thoughtful advice was truly helpful.

emily9

How is your injury feeling now?

This is grammatically okay and makes sense, but it doesn't sound like something a native speaker would say.

That was when I realized this town had become my second home~~town~~.

"Second home" is a fixed expression used even when referring to something that is not literally a house.

Even though we’re apart, I imagine you gazing at the blossoms too, and it makes me feel ~~like we’re close at heart~~close to you.

"Close at heart" doesn't make sense to me.

~~From~~ Kyoko

Typically, we don't put "From" at the end of a formal letter. The sign off ("yours sincerely", "all the best", etc.) also fulfills the purpose of the word "from."

Feedback

Excellent work! You are a better writer than most native English speakers.

akimi

Oct. 31, 2025

Thank you for your advice —it was very helpful. Receiving this kind of feedback from a native speaker is a great opportunity for me. This story will continue, so if you don’t mind, I’d be grateful if you could offer your thoughts again.

Correspondence: A Japanese Epistolary Novella 5-1