appalachia's avatar
appalachia

Jan. 28, 2023

0
Units of Electricity Production by Fuel Source

The pie charts present information about the amount of electricity created in two countries in two separate years.
The figure for electricity generated by Australia dramatically grew to 130 units in 2000, which was nearly three times more than it was in 1980. In France, however, this kind of fuel was much lower. Nuclear power was a noticeable rise from 25 units in 1980 to 126 units, which reached the highest level in 2000 in France.
The hydro power modestly increased by 16 units in Australia over a span of 20 years, however, there was an opposing pattern in France, slightly decreasing to 2 units in 2000. We see a tiny drop in oil in Australia over two different years. Conversely, France had a steady rise. The figures for natural gas showed the same pattern, dropping to 2 units in 2000.
Overall, the total electricity production in both countries increased significantly. Coal was by far the most important fuel source in Australia in both years while nuclear power was the primary source in France. We see a clear upward trend in the amount of electricity of these two resources in their respective countries.

Corrections

Units of Electricity Production by Fuel Source

The pie charts present information about the amount of electricity created in two countries in two separate years.

The figure for electricity generated by Australia dramatically grew to 130 units in 2000, which was nearly three times more than it was in 1980.

"The figure for electricity... .... grew to" implies the figure was growing. The sentence is still understandable, just better with this fix.

In France, however, this kind of fuel usage was much lower.

We usually don't talk about a fuel being lower, but rather the fuel usage.

Nuclear power washad a noticeable rise from 25 units in 1980 to 126 units, which reached the highest level in 2000 in France.

"was" can be replaced by "had" or "experienced" to show that nuclear power rose. "was" implies the nuclear power is the rise described.

The hydro power modestly increased by 16 units in Australia over a span of 20 years, however, there was an opposing pattern in France, slightly decreasing to 2 units in 2000.

We see a tiny drop in oil in Australia over two different years.

Conversely, France had a steady rise.

The figures for natural gas showed the same pattern, dropping to 2 units in 2000.

Overall, the total electricity production in both countries increased significantly.

Coal was by far the most important fuel source in Australia in both years while nuclear power was the primary source in France.

We see a clear upward trend in the amount of electricity of these two resources in their respective countries.

Feedback

This was an impressive read. Everything was very clear, professional and well written, except for the few minor concerns corrected. Any of these minor mistakes could have been made by a native speaker. Great work!

appalachia's avatar
appalachia

Jan. 29, 2023

0

Thanks for your encouragement and correction!

Units of Electricity Production by Fuel Source

The pie charts present information about the amount of electricity created in two countries in two separate years.

The figure for electricity generated by Australia dramatically grew to 130 units in 2000, which was nearly three times more than it was in 1980.

The figure for electricity generated by Australia dramatically grew to 130 units in 2000, which was nearly three times more than it was in 1980.

In France, however, this kind of fuel was much lower.

In France, however, this kind of fuel usage was much lower.

Nuclear power was a noticeable rise from 25 units in 1980 to 126 units, which reached the highest level in 2000 in France.

Nuclear power washad a noticeable rise from 25 units in 1980 to 126 units, which reached the highest level in 2000 in France.

The hydro power modestly increased by 16 units in Australia over a span of 20 years, however, there was an opposing pattern in France, slightly decreasing to 2 units in 2000.

We see a tiny drop in oil in Australia over two different years.

Conversely, France had a steady rise.

The figures for natural gas showed the same pattern, dropping to 2 units in 2000.

Overall, the total electricity production in both countries increased significantly.

Coal was by far the most important fuel source in Australia in both years while nuclear power was the primary source in France.

We see a clear upward trend in the amount of electricity of these two resources in their respective countries.

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